It Starts Small

Every morning I got up before the sun and I was blessed to already have coffee made. My brother in law had to get up really early for work, so there was always coffee. I’d grab coffee and sit on the porch. For the past few mornings I kept having this phrase come up in my mind. Fear the Lord.

I hadn’t quite figured out the Holy Spirit, yet. Later, through one of the biggest trials I faced this last year, I realized that the quiet voice, the presence of Jesus in my heart, that was the Holy Spirit. That’s a fun journey to share, but just know, to this point I hadn’t quite figured that out.

Fear the Lord. Somehow I just knew that in the middle of this journey through faith it must have been important because it kept coming up.

So before we get into that, up to this point in learning about faith, I knew you couldn’t have faith without hearing from God. You hear from God through Jesus. That’s what I knew to be true. Faith wasn’t a leap into the darkness, faith was a step into God’s light. Faith is not a name it and claim it sort of deal. You believe and receive it because God named it and claimed it.

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. Hebrews 11:1

My mind drifted back to this verse. Hope was the bedrock of assurance and substance was what we stood on. In order to have faith we needed to hear the word of God. Hearing was the personal communication from God to me. How does God speak to me?

I believed God spoke to me through my heart. Remember my transformed junk yard. I couldn’t explain it then or even now, but I fully trusted and believed God spoke to me through that place. In the middle of my heart. God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit didn’t have a body, or a face, or definable description. I wasn’t seeing a picture of them, but it was more like a presence. I know that sounds somewhat crazy, but it’s the best way I can describe it. When God speaks to me, it comes within my chest. Not through my ears. It doesn’t come through my mind.

Faith, to me was believing that God spoke to me through this place in my heart. Faith is essentially believing in God. There’s nothing to believe in if you don’t hear him speak.

So fear… I just knew that fear tied into this somewhere. I’d heard so often, fear the Lord, fear the Lord, but I never knew what that meant other than the actual….I’m scared God is going to strike me dead because I’m not perfect.

It’s much easier to figure out what not fearing the Lord is. I came across this:

10 As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one: 11 There is none that understandeth, there is none that seeketh after God. 12 They are all gone out of the way, they are together become unprofitable; there is none that doeth good, no, not one. 13 Their throat is an open sepulchre; with their tongues they have used deceit; the poison of asps is under their lips: 14 Whose mouth is full of cursing and bitterness: 15 Their feet are swift to shed blood: 16 Destruction and misery are in their ways: 17 And the way of peace have they not known: 18 There is no fear of God before their eyes. Romans 3:10-18

Why did I see a picture of myself…. I mean God could’ve just put a picture of myself in place of his word and I’d know exactly the opposite of fearing the Lord is zero faith. I didn’t hear his word, believe in his promises or trust fully in him.

Thine own wickedness shall correct thee, and thy backslidings shall reprove thee: know therefore and see that it is an evil thing and bitter, that thou hast forsaken the Lord thy God, and that my fear is not in thee, saith the Lord God of hosts. Jeremiah 2:19

God gives us his fear? I had to contemplate that for awhile. The only thing I knew about fear is that it was irrational. But is there a rational fear? I thought about snakes. I am scared of snakes. They are a necessary part of the ecosystem, that I prefer not to see or interact with. One bite, and life turns miserable pretty quickly. I don’t like that they slither and creep on the ground and hide in dark icky places. Sort of like bears and mountain lions. They could do some real damage to an unsuspecting person. I respect their strength and power…. Wait a minute…. (Winner winner chicken dinner)

I respect their strength and power. Being on the wrong side of bears can cause you some pretty life threatening problems. Respect. It wasn’t a scary fear I had of them, I respected them.

What if? What if this is the fear God gives us? To respect him knowing, through truth, what happens when we cross the line? It’s not like I’m a complete ignorant fool. I know what happens when I sin. Hello, my picture is all over the Bible. My life is a great detail and testimony of what happens when you live in the world and not on heavens side. Did I respect God and his commands, precepts, and character? Well that’s an obvious and resounding no. I didn’t even have respect for myself.

It got me to thinking. If I didn’t have respect for God’s word, what made me ever think he would speak to me? I didn’t honor his commandments. I didn’t seek him. He was good enough to call on in troubled times. My relationship with him was, God, you’re only good enough when I’m in trouble. Ugh. That’s so icky.

So fear and faith are inseparable.

Fear sees God’s power and holiness and justice.

Faith sees God’s loving kindness grace and mercy.

Huh? I sat there chuckling. It’s just that simple? Trust was knowing his promises never fail. Trust was knowing that when he spoke it would be done. Trust was knowing that if I turned around right now, I knew by his promise what was coming to me. Trust was removing my own ignorance and letting his truth come alive in me. Trust was giving God reverence and respect.

Fear was profitable to me and God.